Possible relief in sight?

So as most of you know, I’ve been struggling lately and not just in the food/weight area.

Let’s look at the numbers quickly.  5 months ago, back in May 2011 I hit my lowest weight at 153.25 pounds and then went on vacation where I gained weight.  I felt bad and tried to continue maintaining around there – obviously I would have loved to go back down, but that just didn’t work out at that time.  From July to now I have been bouncing between 160-170 pounds.  It’s not all about the numbers, but more so on the fact of my eating habits and how I’m dealing with stress — with food.

I feel that I can contribute a lot of my weight gain and food obsessiveness to my the main source of recent stress, my job that started in May 2011.  In the beginning of the job I thought it was just a learning curve and that once I got my feet planted things would be fine, but no.  Things only got worse and it’s not uncommon for me to cry on lunch break.  Yes, I’ll give you the fact that I’m over emotional and may cry over things that others wouldn’t, but I’ve been so overwhelmed that I couldn’t help it.  I was also “dead” so to speak after the work day from how draining the day was.  I felt that I couldn’t function in life and that I wasn’t able to do the things that I enjoyed. I had a hard time spending quality time with my daughter, I was always depressed, I stopped blogging as much, haven’t scrapbooked at all, haven’t been keeping up on the SlimGenics Community or my Google reader.  Now some of those don’t sound important and they may not be, however they were things I enjoyed, yet I just couldn’t do.

So for 5 months I’ve felt lost and it has directly affected my eating because I didn’t know how else to deal with things.  So on top of work stress, I’ve been feeling guilty about food and have been a big mess, but relief might be in sight.  I was offered and accepted a new job.  I’m really hoping that I’ve made the right decision and that things will begin to improve.  Ever since I’ve interviewed I’ve been feeling very anxious and even now that feeling hasn’t went away because I know for the next two weeks work is going to suck and that once I start the new job it’ll be a lot of learning; however hopefully it will get better!

Maybe once I don’t loathe my job then I can focus on eating better and potentially find time/energy for a workout schedule.  I am really hoping that this is the relief that I needed and that I can get back to “normal”.

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2 Responses to Possible relief in sight?

  1. Amy says:

    Girl, you can not give up on yourself! Hang in there. I’m doing SlimGenics myself and I know it’s a battle. I have 25 lbs to my goal. But doesn’t both of our goals include losing the weight and keeping it off? Don’t give up or give in… you did it already – so you know how to do it again. Don’t let it slip away. You look great – I’m sure your body feels so much better too!

    I know this sounds corny, but you have to change your mind about your life. I suffer from depression too – it’s about choosing to be happy (and meds – at least for me that helps me to choose to be happy). Choosing to be happy every minute, hour, and day. You have to change your mind from dispare to grace. Give yourself a break – let the past go. Believe you have a beautiful future a head of you. Believe your new job will be great and it will be – not won’t be perfect but it will be great. You have to believe and choose to be happy. Choosing to be happy a minute at a time will turn into an hour and then hours, days, weeks and months.

    Choose every minute to be happy and soon it’s all you’ll know.

  2. Danielle says:

    Thank you so much Amy! That is such a positive attitude to have. Things will get better, I’m already feeling it. The past two days at work have already been better than most! I’m ready for a new challenge. I’m strong, I can do this! Thanks for being encouraging!!!

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